Malkah Sends Her Man to Miluim

During the latest Lebanon war, Yishai was drafted for a couple of weeks, making me an official Israeli wife. You can read about it in our archives.

I think I was a real trooper during the war. Thank G-d, my husband was not sent into Lebanon, and so I didn't suffer the terrible sleeplessness and terror that other wives were subjected to. However, my husband did call me from the makeshift bunkers of his base as bombs from Lebanon fell in their vicinity, and he was closely involved with a helicopter that was blown up with 5 of our brave brothers and sisters inside. With all this going on, I maintained a don't-freak-out-and-maniacally-cry attitude. I didn't obsessively call, and I put on a "brave face" when we spoke on the phone - I was a good soldier's wife.

That being said, I found myself extremely agitated and disinclined to send my husband for a mere two days to his latest peace-time (ha!) "tour of duty" in the reserves.

There are many reasons for my hesitation.

First, I am concerned with the disorganization of the IDF. Yishai was released from duty 3 times during his miluim (reserve duty), and called back hours later on two of those occasions. Such indecision not only robbed me of confidence in our armed forces, but was an emotional rollercoaster for both of us. Though the army called Yishai in for just 2 days for this latest miluim, I know that at any moment (and even days after he returns home), the powers-that-be could change the plans, and extend his service.

Secondly, there is something about serving in the north of Israel that frightens me now. I feel that our enemies are emboldened, and our forces confused and poorly equipped. If the IDF were drafting my man to a real fight, would they prepare him to win? Would they look after his welfare? Or would they use him as a political pawn, as an expendable resource?

Third, every woman believes that her husband is involved in productive work throughout the course of his day. Whether he makes sneakers, teaches kids, learns Torah, or tries to inspire people to love Israel, he is a productive member of society, a source of joy, comfort, and help at home, and an otherwise beloved person (hopefully). Don't get me wrong - I'm an advocate of vacation. I'm even an advocate of Israel's governmentally-imposed man-vacation, in which men are required to leave their situations for a given amount of time, to don green uniforms, and to guard, build, or help someone or something. But I am not an advocate of time-wasting. Let vacation be vacation-like. Let work be work-like. But the hurry-up-and-wait nature of the army is a waste of time for me, for my husband, and for the IDF.

I get nervous about future wars. I know that my husband will probably be drafted to real war again, that I will have to send him off again, and worry if he's staying dry and warm. My whole happiness, my whole life, and my sense of security will be put on the line again, in the name of the Jewish State. And with all this, I will continue to send my husband to serve in the IDF. I would rather suffer the uncertainty and stress of this life we live than to sit in seeming security anywhere else. I'm proud of my husband, and of all the other Jewish men who leave home to serve their people. May G-d reward you for all that you are willing to give, and protect you from doing so.