"I'M AN IMMIGRANT! WHAT WAS I THINKING?"

The following was written by a ADDeRabbi, a blogger who just made Aliyah on one of the seven recent chartered Nefesh b'Nefesh flights and just took a job with the Tzohar rabbinic organization. He describes a very authentic mental dialogue that returnees are familiar with in various forms.

A Wicked Game of Ping-Pong
Deep Breath In?Deep Breath OutThe kids are adjusting great. They?re making friends. They love school.We made Aliyah for the kids. And they?re doing great.

HOLY FREAKING COW. WE HAVE NO CAR. WE HAVE NO LIFT. WE HAVE NO MONEY!!! HOW DO ISRAELIS SUBSIST ON THESE SALARIES????

Deep breath. Another deep breath.The Kids. The Kids. They?re doing great. They?re happy. They?re adjusting. It?s all about the kids.

I?M LEAVING THE WIFE AND KIDS FOR A WEEK TO TRAVEL TO THE PLACE I THOUGHT WAS IN THE REAR-VIEW MIRROR, FOR A JOB THAT I JUST STARTED AND ENTAILS A PRETTY SERIOUS CAREER CHANGE. THE LIFT ARRIVES THE DAY I LEAVE!

The kids are thrilled to be in Israel. They?re eating well and healthy. They have friends. They?re learning Hebrew. They?re learning Torah. This is where the future is. It?s worth sacrificing the present for a better future. The future. The kids.

I?M AN IMMIGRANT! MY COLLEGE EDUCATION MEANS BUPKIS WHEN I CAN?T GET THROUGH A SENTENCE WITHOUT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS. LOOK AT THOSE GAS PRICES!!!! I?M BLEEDING MONEY. I?M HEMHORRAGING MONEY. I DON?T HAVE MEDICAL INSURANCE YET. NOT TO MENTION LIFE, HOMEOWNER?S, AND, OF COURSE, CAR. I WORK TILL MIDNIGHT. I CAN?T USE MY PHONE AND THE INTERNET SIMULTANEOUSLY, DESPITE THE FACT THAT I?M PAYING FOR ADSL. I?M DROWNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yet, today was a bit better than yesterday, no? Baby steps. And remember, it?s for the kids. The kids the kids the kids the kids the kids the kids the kids. What can possibly be more important?

WHAT THE HELL WERE WE THINKING, LEAVING GOOD JOBS THAT WE WERE DAMN GOOD AT, A PLACE THAT WAS REAL COMFORTABLE?

The grass was not greener there. This is better for the kids. What if your grandparents had stayed in Hungary and Germany? Did they have an easier time when they reached American shores? Nevertheless, they did it because of what they knew would be better for their families in the long run. The kids.

?The great proof of madness is the disproportion of one's designs to one's means.?-Napoleon Bonaparte

And as my grandfather used to say:

Ich bin in der Erd. Git in der Erd. = .אני בארץ. טוב בארץ

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It is me now.

If you are on your way Home, keeping up with the blogs of those who have crossed the sea really brings you here and can prepare you for the good the bad and the awesome.
I am uncertain the complexity of life in the Jewish habitat can ever be truly described to those not residing inside it - but the air of the Land of Israel can truly be transmitted through the Internet. Welcoming the seven flights of Jews this summer was quite a reminder of the fact that there truly is an Aliyah revolution afoot.

I hope to spotlight several Oleh and Olah blogs in the coming weeks.

Drink plenty of water.

Kumah!