Israel and Man's Quest for a Lavatory

Yet again, dear readers, I have spent a long time without speaking to you. Sorry - life happens very fast these days.

Anyway, recently I've been noticing that human dignity can make life very funny. Over the last couple of weeks, I've found myself more than once searching for a bathroom with urgency. You know, not the casual "I guess I could go now, " but the pressing "5 more minutes and I will never again be able to look in the eyes of the people in my immediate vicinity."

Yishai and I took a family trip with his mom and siblings to Sinai a couple of weeks ago. This, in and of itself, was practically out of body in its level of sheer communion with nature, and spiritual and physical enjoyment (perfect weather, great hiking, simple food, met with endless open sky, pristine air, mountains untouched since Creation), as well as socio-politically enlightening. I developed a great respect for the Bedouin (we were guided by a handful of Bedouin men from the Tarabin family), who are generally kind to their animals and the surrounding environment, as well as friendly, polite, hospitable, and generally non-threatening and fun-loving. I didn't get this same feeling from the Egyptians who are occupying that stretch of the Land of Israel, who I sensed, under their moustached smiles, really hate our guts and couldn't care less about the formerly-virgin beaches they now pollute).

During this trip, we obviously, well, "went" outside, behind boulders or whatever. The scene is so hilarious: imagine these white people in the middle of the desert, their eyes squinty in the sun, searching for a private, well-suited crevice out there in the wilderness, walking and climbing. Eyes scouring the rocks, "Not you, not you, maybe... oh, too sandy, to public, the ground is too angular and unbalanced.... Oh, this is perfect, THANK G-D!!!!!!!" The act of searching for a good bathroom spot is also so wrought with focus and determination - several times over the course of this trip, I found myself laughing at my own seriousness and anguish during these little searches. Also, a word to the wise: baby wipes make a camping trip just that much more civilized.


Back in the Medina (the State of Israel, as opposed to the much bigger Land, which is also found, according to many authorities, where we were in Sinai), one may also notice a certain lack of adequate or accessible "facilities." I recently walked about a mile to the Central Bus Station in Jerusalem just to use the bathroom there. Many restaurants aren't willing to let you use their restrooms unless you buy something, and the others are so confined that your bathroom experience just can't be anonymous enough for my comfort. Finally accessing these rare bathrooms, you feel like you've found a long lost friend. You want to talk to your bathroom, to thank it for being there when you need it.

I know this isn't something ladies (or any such gentlefolk) talk about, but this is all part of the Zionist dream! There are many good bathrooms and sandy surfaces here in the Land, dear friends, come find them.