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*** THE ALIYAH REVOLUTION ALBUM ***

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Revenge of the Hajj Heat Rash




WARNING: The article you are about to read is not in any way related to sophisticated political analysis or higher spiritual thought. It's just darn funny.

Hajj Pilgrims Offered Relief From Chafed Thighs
July 16, 2007

RIYADH -- Help is being offered to Muslims afflicted by chafed thighs during the Hajj pilgrimage in Saudi Arabia, the Saudi Gazette reported Saturday.

Worshipers at the annual event are to be offered "seamless trousers" for the first time to guard against chafing, the English language daily said.

The trousers are designed to be worn under the ihram, the loose-fitting white robe worn by Muslims undertaking the pilgrimage.

"Pilgrims often complain of sore thighs because of friction as a result of long walks. The trouser will protect the thighs," the paper said.

The pilgrimage, which is expected to next take place in December, is one of the five pillars of Islam that all able-bodied Muslims must undertake once in a lifetime if they have the means.

Nearly 2.4 million people flocked to holy sites in Saudi Arabia earlier this year to perform the Hajj, including more than 1.6 million from outside the kingdom.

In January 2006, 364 pilgrims were killed in a crush during the pilgrimage's stoning ritual.

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Dear Ahmeds and Fatimas,

Shalom from Israel! Sorry about the shifshuf (but that's how it is in our crazy Middle East, right?). I'm so happy for you... seamless pants, that's great - and novel!

I found somemore info in our shared quest for a chafe-free lifestyle. Just hand over all Jewish captives, and you can have it.

Okay, you got me! I'll give it to you for free - like everything else:

HOW TO PREVENT CHAFING

Chafing often occurs on the inner thigh, groin area, armpits, nipples, etc. as a result of sweating, and friction from body parts rubbing together, or friction from clothing. The best treatment for chafing is prevention.

Stay hydrated - Drink plenty of water to prevent dehydration. Among other things, staying well hydrated will help prevent chafing by allowing you to perspire freely. When you stop perspiring your sweat will form salt crystals on your body increasing friction.

Clothing - Select snug fitting (but not tight) clothing. Shorts or jog bras that are too tight or too loose will create friction and rubbing.

Choose breathable, wicking fabrics .... Coolmax, Supplex, Polypro, etc are good choices. No cotton!

Clothing should have few seams, flat seams, and small flat stitching.

Do not wear untested clothing on a long walk and never wear unwashed new clothing.

Stay Dry - Use talcum powder or cornstarch to stay dry. (Gold Bond is highly recommended and can be found in most drug stores. Two Toms Blister shield is another good option.)

Lubricant - When you increase your mileage all other efforts may fail. It is time for real preventative. There are a variety of lubricants on the market. They are readily available at most running stores. Many people use petroleum jelly because it is inexpensive and easy to find. I don't really like the consistency, and find it doesn't stay on as well as many of the sports/running products.

Make your own lubricant - with this recipe I found on a couple of the running boards. Mix equal parts A & D ointment (diaper rash cream) and Vaseline (1 cup each). Then add vitamin E cream and Aloe Vera cream (1/4 cup each) to improve consistency and smell. (Mixture should be stiff, yet applicable.) It not only protects skin from chafing but can help heal the skin and also is helpful with blister prevention. Low cost and effective. Measurements do not have to be accurate.... this is not baking!

Treatment - The general treatment for chafing is to treat the area by washing with soap and cool to luke warm water. Then apply an antibacterial ointment or antiseptic spray, cover with a bandaid or sterile gauze. This works well, but I prefer A and D ointment. (Yes, the diaper rash ointment!!) It relieves pain and itch, promotes healing, and keeps the area lubricated so you can continue walking without discomfort. After this product was recommended to some fellow walkers it soon became known as "Magic A & D" it works so well.

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I hope you guys have a super-awesome hajj this year, filled with all those cool tramplings and self-flagellatings that make you guys so fun.

Love,
Your Sister By The Same Mister,
Malkah



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3 Comments:

  • At 1:16 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Making fun of Islamo-fascism is good - we should not allow their image to be too serious or overpowering. they are a bunch of dogs, liars, and thieves. They deserve heat rash for all the hot-air they spew. Thanks Malkah for cheering up my day at their expense.

     
  • At 8:12 AM , Blogger גיל רונן said...

    Not the James Woolsey? What are you up to nowadays, man?

     
  • At 6:19 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Malka, you funny girl. "Your sister by the same mister" does apply here, doesn't it. Anyway, I appreciate all that good walking info as I have begun walking for health and was immediately gunned down by . . . what did you say? shifshuf? Yeh. Even in Brooklyn, it's the same rash. So, rashes and too much caffeine is what is secretly driving the Middle East mad, is my humble opinion. Have a great day. Ellen

     

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